I still have the check. He came home for a minute last night to grab some of his things. He was high as a kite. I again expressed to him that I can not see him in that state. He never mentioned the check and neither did I. He left pretty quickly and I think he will be gone at minimum the full weekend. Something has gotta give. I have so much to do this weekend for the holidays. I must find time to read my 12 step books and other healing material. Part of me just wants to shred the damn check and pretend it never came.
I want to thank you all for your comments. I feel the strength of you pouring off my computer screen. Some of you have so many years of experience with this. I often get upset with our boys because we tell them something so they don't have to learn the hard way. And here I am, at times still resisting following examples of those that have been there and done it long before me.
I hope you all have a super fantastic weekend!