November 17, 2009
Alanon Question
I have a quick question regarding Alanon and the 12 steps. Our small group in our small town do not have any type of meetings to do actual step work. We pick a topic and go. So, I am wondering how it works in other communites. I mean, do I just read through the steps and work them on my own? Any comments would be appreciated.
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8 comments:
I am so glad you asked this, I have that same question. Its easy to find meetings here but no actual step meetings. I think you are suppose to do them with a sponsor? But its hard to ask a stranger to be your sponsor, I don't know how to do that either. Its never been talked about in the meetings I visited.
You ask someone in AlAnon and who you trust to be your sponsor. You do the steps with your sponsor.
Step tables at a meeting are not to "do" the steps, but to talk about what an individual step means to you.
The thing is to get a sponsor and start. Don't wait for everything to be "perfect."
I had a freind who went through alanon, and she had a sponsor, who was always there for her. I believe she was "issued" the sponsor. The sponsor is usually someone who has been clean and sober, and in the program for quite some time. If I remember correctly, the steps are things you work through on your own, at your own pace. Im just giving second hand memory here, so dont bet the farm on it. Good Luck.
I went to a meeting ( one of my early on ones) that had 7 people in it and none were sponser's. It was as if everyone was waiting for a sponser to volunteer. The a few months later two of the women became partners in the steps, since one felt just as new at the other and they began attending other meetings, expanding their horizons and reading more.
The hardest thing to do for me was to ask for a sponser, to identify what I wanted and ask. Its putting yourself out there, ya know?
As Lou said we do the steps with a sponsor. In meetings we discuss what the step means to us.
As a sponsor, I have worked the steps with lots of sponsees. We use "Pathways to Recovery" as a guide. It works beautifully.
Hope this helps.
PG
Sorry I don't have any information on this but reading the comments and your posts is for me a great learning point.
Happy Thursday to you!
Thank you all for sharing the info with me. I will ask for a sponser next time I go and see what happens. I will purchase "Pathways to Recovery" and try really hard to do the work on my own as well. It is time for me to get serious about my recovery, more than just seeking guidance from my counselor and an occasional meeting. I am going to try.
Find someone whose message you like, who has solutions and doesn't focus on the problems. Make sure that they have a sponsor and have worked the steps and then ask that person to sponsor you. I found that I wanted to "connect" with a person that I asked and luckily I did. Your sponsor will then begin to work with you as a guide through the steps.
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